Many have asked me so I thought I’d write about it. In June [6 months ago] I wrote my biological mother a letter; read about it here. I wrote her a letter. In short; I do not know if she got it, as I didn’t put a return address, I have not received an email from her.
*Let me just say that… I’m fairly certain she is my biological mother. Everything pieces together. In my eyes, I’m going to assume she is. I just wanted to throw that little disclaimer out there.
I have the email added to my phone and it’s the only one I’ve added the notification to. I don’t want to say I’ve “forgotten” it; I think about it. I drive by her subdivision everyday on my way to work. I just don’t worry about it. Odd for me because I’m a worrier. But it’s a different thing, because my life goes on if she doesn’t reach out. I did my part, and in my eyes, she is “found”. That sounds weird. I’m content with it.
Oddly, I haven’t really actively looked for my Dad since I was a freshman in college. I’d like to, but I haven’t felt the urge to put much effort into it? Maybe I should.
Back to the letter… It’s almost my birthday, she has to for sure think about me right? Getting a letter 36 1/2 years after you birth a child, and make a brave choice to give me up for adoption. I’m not sure if she thinks about me every day or if she has days where she just carries about her day. But I can’t help but wonder if just maybe something might stir around or after my birthday? I’m not holding my breath. I’m sure it’s heavy for her.
I’ve said other times if she does reach out will come when I’m least expecting it, and it’ll catch me way off-guard; so maybe around my birthday is too obvious.
Time will tell, I suppose.
everyday jess 