18 years and 12

9/11 has so many memories.

I’m sure today Facebook + Instagram will be flooded with the memories of such. It will be the day we remember, we talk about “where we were when the world stopped turning”; thank you Alan Jackson.

I was sleeping in my dorm room at Central College and my roomie came in [she was coming in from practice] and had turned on the TV to watch the news and watched the second plane hit.  We opened our door to our dorm, we heard screams, cries, all the emotions. Classes were cancelled, life stopped. We were glued to the television. Calling home. There were twins [one was named Reagan, I don’t remember the other’s name] who had family that worked in both DC and NYC; they couldn’t get a hold of them. Late into the evening we found out both were safe. I’m fairly certain the rest of the week was hard to focus, and we talked about it in most classes. Thankfully it was just the start of the semester, but like many, a day I’ll never forget.

I called and talked to Mom, I remember she told me Joe was mowing at Shenanigans and he saw a plane fly over – it was likely AF1 en route to Omaha?   Our world changed that day. Everyone’s did.   Eyes were opened politically, and it was just the beginning.

Six years later;  9/11/07, a day after I bought a new to me car, I was backing out of my Mom’s driveway headed to Iowa City to get new Rain-X wiper blades, talking to Shawn on the phone.  I had a seizure. Probably just after I backed out of the driveway, from under the basketball hoop. She said she heard me drop the phone and kept saying my name, panicked but wasn’t sure what to do.

I drove quite a ways, landed on the opposite side of the road on a fiber optic box, and in an ambulance. Thankful to Denny Wachs for calling Joe, my parents met me at the ER. I was in and out in the ambulance, but told Dog “I’m in a fucking ambulance, musta had a seizure” I don’t know if I remember him saying this or he just told me but he said “Yup, she’s gonna be okay!” I was kept overnight – my first hospital stay outside of being born.

I’m celebrating 12 years of seizure freedom today. While today is a somber day for America; I’m celebrating silently. I’m a boring patient, I just take 7 pills a day to keep the seizures at bay. I no longer have to fill out medical paperwork; thank goodness. I see a PA, whom I’m not a big fan of, but my being a boring / non-seizing patient doesn’t really warrant me seeing my neurologist, and I get it. I just go in yearly waste an hour of my time and she refills my meds. I don’t even do the pseudo drunk driving neurological tests anymore.

I’m grateful, truly.  I’ve lived on my own for 8 1/2  years now. It was pretty embarrassing to have to move back home and stay there til I felt comfy enough live solo.

I’m not naive enough to think it’ll a seizure will  never happen again. I don’t worry about it as much as I used to, but it’s still on my mind. Things like, living in a town / city with public transportation, watchful of strobe lights, mindful of sleep, if I go anywhere solo I let SOMEONE know. But on the flip side, I don’t let it overpower me in that I don’t let it keep me from doing things.

I used to be freaked out about taking baths… but let’s face it, the bathtubs in rentals are too small for a chunky chick like me to drown in. If it doesn’t cover knees and boobs, I’m fairly certain I’m safe!  Now, let it be known, I’m not the most patient person so baths aren’t really my thing. I read via my iPad so I fear dropping it, and no fancy protection thing will make me comfortable enough to do so!